2017年4月24日 星期一

Log #5

        In fact, I am a person who doesn’t like to talk in front of too many people. I have less confidence in myself. I don’t know why I often get nervous easily when everyone pays attention to me and listens to me. Sometimes I am envious of those who can show their confidence, express their feelings, and share their ideas generously. When people ask me, “What kind of person you are?” I often feel confused because I usually can’t explain what kind of person I am. I often think why can’t I reply them; I actually the one who understand myself the most. However, I know I don’t really understand myself too much. I want to prove myself that I am actually a person who can show the best to others, do many meaningful things, and learn how to express myself, so I decide to join the student association of our department. I actually learn a lot such as communicating with people, arranging my time efficiently, and being more confidence in myself. Although there are still many things that I have to learn, I think I have done a great job at least.

        Sometimes I will also think I am a timid person. Every time others request me to do something that I don’t want to do, I often don’t know how to refuse. I know I am not happy about this, but I often choose to ignore my feelings. Until I read the article that I paste below, I realize that I am wrong. It mentions that “Stop being your own worst enemy! Stop lying to yourself about your emotions and feelings and start accepting them and allowing yourself to feel whatever is it you feel.” I am really inspires by this sentence because I understand that I should follow my own heart or I will feel upset every time when this kind of things happen. Finally, I want to share another sentence that I think it is really good in the same article. “Being true to my feelings and acknowledging them as well as validating them have released so much fear in me. It has released my fear of not being good enough as well as my fear of not living up to the expectations I set for myself.” Just as the first paragraph that I mention, I have less confidence in myself, so I will sometimes feel I am not good enough. However, after reading this, I feel much better and get more understanding in myself.


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