2016年12月10日 星期六

log #7

I think some people didn’t want others to take pity on us, but it’s this personality that makes us a human being because human beings will try to put themselves in others’ shoes and hope they could bring optimistic power to those who face difficulties so that they could hang in there and have the courage to move on. In previous days, I saw a disabled man almost falling down, and I felt sorry for him from the bottom of my heart. Thus, I came toward him to see whether I could help. Although he didn’t ask me for help in the end, I felt great that I had tried to offer a help at least.    

     Afterward, Hazel and Gus planned to go abroad; however, both Hazel’s parents and Gus’s parents were worried about their health. Gus shouted at his mother, “Because it is my life, it belongs to me.” In my perspective, If I were Hazel and Gus, I wouldn’t go abroad to achieve my dream. I don’t want to disappoint them because no one could promise that I would come back safe and sound. What if my cancer became severe and kicked the bucket? I believe my parents couldn’t accept the truth and would feel guilty that they granted me the permission and put me in the risk. I hope that when I walked down the last passage of my life, it’s my parents who kept me company, and I could bring the happiness to them in my limited life. On the other hand, if I were their parents, I would let my children make their dream come true because I didn’t want them to go to heaven with regrets. In my eyes, they are the masters of their lives, so they have the right to do whatever they want. I know I would definitely feel heart-broken, but I would rather let my children go to heaven when they were engaged in what they liked instead of dying with wishes unfulfilled.

  Unfortunately, Gus’s cancer relapsed, and he told Hazel this bad news. I felt touched by Hazel’s words, “Only now I loved a grenade did I understand the foolishness of trying to save others from my own impending fragmentation.” Although Hazel knew that their love was destined to be temporary and that she would feel her heart stabbed by a sharp knife some day; however, she couldn’t give up their relationship. When we really love someone, we are willing to pay the price no matter how dear it is. She made me think of my father who got a cancer, too. The doctor said, “Your father might relapse and he needs to transfer a lung next time.” I know that cutting the lung is painful, but if it happened, I would be willing to give my lung to him because I love him very much, and no one could replace his position in my mind. 

  I think Gus will die because it seems that the cancer spread to all his body. What Hazel can do is to accompany him until the last minute of Gus's life. 

沒有留言:

張貼留言