Log #5

The Girl on the Train

Paula Hawkins

Page: ~75

     Rachel kept watching the couple lived beside the track from the same commuter train every morning. She had noticed them for about one year, and even called them Jess and Jason. She watched them everyday--sometimes only Jess. Rachel would think about what did they do last night, what are they doing right now and next, and how happy they are. She thought as if she knew them very well. Not far away from Jess and Jason's house located a house which used  to be hers and now lived Anna and Tom, her ex-husband. Rachel used to have a happy life like Jess, but after divorced with Tom, everything changed. She was an alcoholic and lodged in her acquaintance's house.

     I think Rachel projected herself upon Jess, and wished they would be happy--as if her old happy days with Tom. However, from Jess, or Megan's view, this was not a life her wanted. Her gallery was shut down, and she found nothing worth engaging in. Although her husband loved her very much, she just couldn't be content with this normal and boring life. This might be one reason that she betray her husband.

     Rachel got angry to find the fact and condemn Jess's behavior (Of course Jess, or Megan, didn't know or meet or talk to her), because she had been betrayed by Tom, too. From Rachel's and Megan's perspective, I know one urges the loyalty to marriage, and that the other just wants to follow her heart. How about Tom's? Why did he betray Rachel? What did he think? And I see no need on Rachel's dislike toward Megan's behavior. Rachel projected herself upon Megan, and after the bubble burst, she felt she was betrayed. However to Megan, this was her way of living, and she was not happy with the marriage.

     From the very first part of the story, I found that everyone of us assumes how others are and begrudge them. But actually, they might not be as happy as we think of. Life is not easy, and everyone has his or her own stuff; There is no need of envy. What we can do is to compare with the past and improve ourselves. Rachel is a bad example who can't walk out from that divorce, and is addicted to alcohol. As for the decisions we disagree, they might be made under certain conditions or out of some considerations. We can disagree with them but not attack them.